The League of Bearded Catholics

So many little indicators, lately, that it's time to do this. I've been sitting on it for a while, but the world should no longer have to go on without The League of Bearded Catholics.

I started thinking about the need for such a thing years ago, as I began to notice that a lot of my favorite Catholics (like, say, on EWTN and elsewhere) were becoming more, shall we say, follically assertive. A significant number of Catholic men I most admired, I noticed, were sporting beards. I won't begin dropping names, yet, but they are many. I remember taking note of this (again), one day and thinking to myself, "There should be some kind of club... a brotherhood of hairy-faced Catholic dudes.".

I see this new enthusiasm for facial growth to be a very hopeful sign, an indication that, not only are Catholic men again embracing the God-given grace of manhood, but the whole Church in the West (or at least in America) may be re-discovering the testosterone that had been mysteriously drained over the last several decades. This transcends matters of mere sex, though. You see signs of a new boldness and intellectual vigor among prominent orthodox Catholic women just as you do in men. Catholic women bloggers are some of my favorite reads.

I'll be putting together a core group here in the Ozarks (those I can tempt with beer and cheese) that can serve as a sort of ad hoc national hub, but please don't think of this as another Catholic men's organization. Anyone can tell you, I'm far too disorganized to start an organization. My hope and my aim is that we will be something like the opposite of an organization. Organizations are too stuffy and are the enemy of fun. And budgets make my head hurt.

The idea is not even to be affiliated in any official capacity with the Catholic Church, or with any local parish. We of TLBC are Catholic primarily in character and sympathy and flavor, not in structure. Our local parish priests will certainly be invited, though. Our structure might be described as "amoebic" (as in "amoebic dysentery").

Nor is it strictly necessary that all in attendance have beards (though that will be encouraged), or that they even be men. A beard, however, will be necessary to gain admittance to all League meetings, without exception. This is one of the few hard and fast Rules of the League. That means that, for those without beards, one will be provided.

Naturally, the Lost Art of Catholic Drinking will be pursued (very important for warding off amoebic dysentery), so you could think of it as Promoting the Arts.

Finally, the name of the League was the subject of some research (okay, not a lot) as well as spirited debate. It happens that the letters TLBC may also stand for Tolkien, Lewis, Belloc and Chesterton, and the writings of these brilliant Brits will form a cornerstone of all League meetings, with members bringing favorite passages to read aloud, book recommendations, reviews and discussion, in a manner that can be instantly recognized as the opposite of a study group. The idea is not to study, the idea is to enjoy the writing of these men, and any others tangentially related to them, who influenced them, or who were influenced by them.

Look for a new TLBC Blog next week, with a pretty much arbitrary list of League Rules and By-Laws, articles, t-shirts, stickers, mugs and similar folderol.

Comments

[e.]

TLBC - Terribly Loud Bastards of Chesterton (kidding, of course).

[jim janknegt]

Count me in. I am enjoying my current beard like I have never before. It is almost totally white and I am letting it get big and bushy.

[Celeste]

Would membership be open to post menopausal women as well?

There should be some perks...

[Tim J.]

HAR!

This will have to be addressed in the by-laws... or by the in-laws.

TLBC has an open and generous membership policy, sort of like those rehab clinics in Beverly Hills.

Not only will becoming a member be ridiculously simple, but the fact is that we will, from time to time, claim as members people who have never heard of us, or would like to forget they ever heard of us.

We will also, in the style of the Masons, reach back into history and claim as members any individuals we think are cool and will lend some panache and/or credibility to the brand.

The important thing is that you wear a beard *on the inside*.

[Shmikey]

I have a beard policy. I start to grow mine when the leaves start to turn in the fall and I shave it off when I the leaves are full in the trees in spring. I love my beard, but like the seasons, I don't appreciate it unless I go without it for a while. It is great in the winter, I must say!

[Del]

oh wow....

I enjoyed my beard for a few years. Nowadays... I enjoy the manly art of mug-and-brush shaving. And the art of tobacco-pipe smoking.

Whatever my mood in follicular expression.... I wholeheartedly support TLBC! Long may it meander!

[Tim J.]

Del, I'm... I... don't know what to say! Trying to imagine you without a beard is causing some kind of cognitive dissonance.

I'm spiraling! Help!...

Ah, well. I had been shaving (neck & cheeks!) with an eclectic razor, but it broke, so I went back to shave cream & blades, which is a more pleasant experience and also gives a better shave... but takes a little longer.

One basic tenet of TLBC is that a little time saving is no excuse for giving up on any good thing. Buzzing machines should be replaced by hand labor wherever possible.

I think it's clear that blade shaving is a slam dunk win over electric by TLBC standards. My next step is mug & brush, which I really look forward to.

[Jeff Holston]

Dude, I'm like SO there!