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June 29, 2009



I wrote a story about this idea back in Dappled Things' first edition:


There is one positive aspect to media coverage of celebrity deaths, I suppose: they have everything we think we want, and yet it still comes to nothing in the end. A memento mori, and hopefully a reminder to pray for their souls.


I think i was about 11 years old when my grandmother died. She was the first person who broke my heart.

I really did feel totally bereft when her life ended. In fact i was so distraught the decision was made by my parents not to allow me to go to the funeral.

Back then I knew that death existed, but I never realised anyone I loved would ever die.

I've lost a lot of people since, friends and family members, my daughter's father being the most profound loss almost 17 years ago (on July 21st). I remember it like it was yesterday. Horrible. The police coming to our home and telling me they had found Steve's body. God. I don't even want to think about it. I was holding our 8 month old baby in my arms and oh. There are some kinds of hurt that just never diminish, even after 17 years. Brutal.

It bothers me sometimes the whole furore that ensues when a person who lived a 'public life', dies.

There are people dying every day through lack of food and water and medical care, through corrupt governments etc....the only time they ever hit the news is when some celebrity gets off their backside to go and wander the slums as either a publicity stunt or a humanitarian endeavour (which also brings with it publicity if they are famous to start off with).

I'm very sad for the kind of life M.J. had with his father beating him and pushing him on and on and showing very little love toward him....M.J tried to find that which was missing from his life by exploring various avenues...but it seems pretty clear to me that he was never truly happy...either with himself or with his life. That's why i'm sad for him. The same as i would feel sorry for anyone who as abused and felt unloved and led a turbulent life.

As it happens, I'm not devastated by his loss to the music world. I think he left us a pretty good legacy of music. Some may disagree, but i think he had already given us his best work.

Farah Fawcett. Well i loved Charlies Angels as a girl and Farah was like my Sindy doll, only she was a living, breathing version...she was the Angel every little girl wanted to be most like....and the one that most of us would never be like at all!

From the little i know about her i think she bore her illness bravely and i would hope that i could be half as courageous if i should ever have to undergo the disease she had.

Over here she wasn't a big star' since about 25 years ago when she was in Charlie's Angels. I feel most for her son (with Ryan O)who was already off the rails by all media accounts.

I pray for the souls of M.J and F.F. But these are 2 souls, amongst the souls of many hundreds of thousands who will die this week...whose names will never be upon our lips, who do not fill our memories with their music or acting ability.


Gosh, that was a long comment, sorry Tim!

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